I think I’m ready to become a man

Seriously, I am.

I’m in no position to write anything original today so I think I’m going to compile some funny things I’ve seen/read on the internet. I would highly recommend #6 and #8.

  1. A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle
  2. She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say “when”.
  3. Let’s all take a moment and be thankful that spiders don’t fly.
  4. “Chillax” will never sound cool
  5. Telling an angry woman to calm down works as well as baptizing a cat.
  6. I got a black belt in bitches.  (Texts from Bennett)
  7. Do Russian’s have “In capitalist America jokes?”. In Capitalist America, banks rob you! 
  8. Any advice? Drink. (Texts from Hillary)
  9. Walked across the street today. Danger is my middle name (@The_HelenKeller)

FYI, this was not a cop out. It took me a while to find some of these things again.


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