Dating in Sacramento

You ever have one of those nights where you think to yourself, “Oh my god, I can’t believe I am a part of this conversation right now, I need to write about it.” Then I remembered that I have a blog.

So last night I had a TERRIBLE date with this guy, let’s call him L. We’re calling him L because his first name starts with L. In any event, we went to East Sacramento to a place called The Shack which is kind of a local dive bar – I LOVE dive bars. Although, I’m not a huge fan of dive bars that have 20 taps and have 0 ciders on tap, so -2 for that place. Also, their food menu was meh but the french fries were delicious. That was probably the only good thing about the date – the french fries.

Have you ever had one of those meetings where you sit down and you know nothing good is about to come from it? The glance you get from the other person on the other side of the table leads you to think that its no good — yeah, I got that look. I showed up and I got this look of disappointment (I’m totally fine with it because I’m fairly certain I gave him that look — I’m not a huge fan of facial hair most because its scratchy). Anyways, we got over the awkward silence of disappoint in about 2 minutes. It’s never a good sign when you are in a date for about 10 minutes and you have nothing to talk about. We managed to keep some sort of wavy conversation. So no big deal there.

We left the bar at 8:30 (I arrived around 7), which sounds promising – everything is ok, I already know I’m not going to see him again by that point but we decide to walk around. Anyway, about 10 feet into our walk he says, “Oh you’re Jewish right? I’m Muslim.” And then proceeds to talk about the one other person he knows who is Jewish girl from the east coast but they got along great. WHO THE FUCK BRINGS UP RELIGION ON A FIRST DATE? Granted it’s happened before, but only when the other person was Jewish and we talk about crazy Jewish stereotypes and about how their Jewish mothers are thrilled that they’re on a date with a Jewish engineer (I’m not even kidding). So L keeps talking about how he knows nothing about Judaism, which I don’t really care about I’m still incredibly appalled that we’re even having this conversation. I’m not only my religion and I feel like he was fixating on the whole thing.

The date ended in an awkward goodbye, we didn’t even hug, we made no mention of future plans. I think the second worst part of the date was about how he claimed to be a sports fan but actually wasn’t — when he realized that I knew more about football than he did, he got kind of embarrassed. Good.

One of the things that really bothers me about these online dating websites is the massive misrepresentation that people project. So L is originally from Turkey, he was born there, moved here when he was 10, moved back there, and then moved back to the states 1.5 years ago. I have no problem that he’s from Turkey – I couldn’t care less. What I am annoyed about is that on his profile he writes that he lived in Turkey for 3 years and has been to a bunch of countries that I was to visit and made it seem like he was just living life to the fullest. It’s a lot different when you’re from there and then go and visit all those places when you’re living there than when you’re moving there for the first time and visiting all those places. When you speak the language and have family in all these places that you visit, it’s so much different than winging it which is what his profile makes it seem.

Also, he was kind of lame. Like really lame. I don’t think I got a sense of his hobbies or anything. I know a bunch about his friends — they sound cool. He was not.

So I understand that I’m probably coming off as an incredibly bigoted asshole BUT there are some things that you talk about on the first date, religion is not one of them… I don’t think a christian would be like, “OH HAI! YOU’RE JEWISH?! I’M CHRISTIAN” that would never happen… Like I don’t really understand what he was trying to do.

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