Reason 15,478 Why I’m in Love with Vladimir Putin

The New Yorker published an article yesterday about how hotel guests in Sochi are complaining about the portraits of Putin that hang on the walls in their hotel rooms. Evidently, the hotels that were built especially for the Olympics have chosen to decorate their rooms with portraits of Putin “semi-nude” (i.e. not wearing a shirt) being a man and riding bears, horses, dragons, etc.

Seriously, how sexy is that? Yeah, I see you Mr. President.

A couple from Ohio were quoted as saying, “I did not travel thousands of miles just to be grossed out.” Seriously? Get over it. You traveled thousands of miles to see athletes compete in one of the most amazing sporting events in the world — who cares if you have a portrait of Putin hanging on your wall? Realistically, you should be watching the games live, not sitting in your room thinking about Putin.

Not one to hide his feelings, Putin has dismissed the hotel guests as “babies who cry”. Well played sir, well played. Putin also said, “These people who are complaining about what is on their walls should be grateful, at least they got one of the hotel rooms with walls.” BAM! At least you guys got walls!

On that happy note, I don’t expect the complaints about the conditions in Sochi to die down for at least another 3 or 4 days. These people are competing in Siberia, there’s nothing in Siberia. Just kidding, I have looked at a map and Sochi is not in Siberia. My bad. Or at least there wasn’t anything until a few years ago when they started building arenas and hotels for the Olympics. The International Olympic Committee chose Sochi over Pyeongchang (South Korea) and Salzburg (Austria) and I’m fairly certain that they are currently regretting this decision. It’s in Russia this year and I think this might be the last one for a while. It’s 2 weeks. People, you can handle two weeks. Anyone who wants out, I’ll trade. I’d love to be in Sochi right now.

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